H1N1 anyone?

Oh my God, the swine flu is here! And my mind is working overtime with all the conspiracy theories I've read in my lifetime. That some ambitious drug company released the strain so they could make millions off the sales of the anti-virals that they have been manufacturing in secret for the last few years. That this is bio-terrorism by some vague group of individuals with access to a lot of money and power. That this is indeed the 'end-of-the-world' scenario predicted for 2012! Ooh, ooh, add the mandatory alien stuff to the list too.

For me, Reality and Fiction collide at times like these :) What if Confucius was indeed the Robin Cook or Stephen King of his time, and by suggestive conditioning/reasoning we have come to believe that he has predicted everything under the sun? What if all he was spinning was a fabulous yarn? I will always wonder if reality spawned fiction or if it was the other way around..

Well, all I can do right now is stay off the swimming lessons at the public pool. There goes my swimming career :) Goodbye Dheelps. (Deepika/Phelps, get it?.. *blink*! .. Here is where I should shoot myself for such bad jokes)

On a side note, Indro thinks I should blog about the fabulous BITSian life. Sounds like a monumental task. Maybe I will.. Soon.

On another note, I HAVE 2 FOLLOWERS! Ok, B doesn't really count. I slid bamboo skewers under his nails until he agreed to become my follower. But Nims, I'm honored :)

Ya Mon! Irie.

What better time to blog about a wonderful Jamaica trip than two months later on a damp, windy day in Chicago?! I wish I had gotten around to the Jamaica log a little earlier, since I'm sure I could've scrounged up some sarcasm then.. You see, I'm so obsessed with the sarcasm these days, I simply have to try and squeeze in a bit of it in everything I do. Wish it were as easy for me as it is for B!

I must start out by saying that I've always wanted to take a tropical island vacation. So when we got sick of the REALLY bad weather in Chi, we got so enamoured by the very idea of escaping reality that 'Swoosh' went the credit card in a couple of days. And we were booked on an all-inclusive vaca at Negril. No Beaches or Sandals resorts for us though - we wanted the real deal. But not so real that we would spend the entire vaca in a daze of pot smoke! So we picked RIU Negril.

Things I remember right now:

• The flights were easy (whats 4 hrs for someone who does 24 hrs every other year!), and the minute we stepped off the flight, I was in heaven. Imagine an airport with huge glass windows all around, a beautiful view, great stores, extremely friendly people, and yellow and lime green walls! The whole trip was an experience in saturation. The yellow/green/red/black Jamaican colors on clothes and turbans, our orange room, the different-every-day-blue of the ocean, and the pinks and purples of the sunsets. Color EVERYWHERE.
• Then there were the bus journeys to/from the resort on different ocasions. For anyone that has done the Delhi-Pilani bus route, or a taxi ride in Bombay, you've pretty much seen it all. But remember, we were the ONLY Indians the whole time. Imagine this scenario: A narrow single lane on each side, and the usual buses and vans on the road trying to make good time for whatever. And in between all this, a stopped car. So what does the bus do? Swerves while at the same time there is no sign that the van on the opposite side is going to let you pass. Hair's breadth. Normal, right? Apparently not to all the 'others'. I've encountered less screams and adrenalin on roller coasters. You'd think these people have never been in uncivilized traffic. Oh, wait..
• And then there was the curious case of the two Indians drinking from a real coconut. Behind whom a dozen white folk gathered asking what it was, and where they could score themselves a couple of those. The Jamaicans working the resort took us under their wing and decided to serve us true cold nariyal pani straight from the source. So, once we explained the stuff to them, they lined up, and got their coconuts. But what did they do? Made a bee-line to the nearest bar and added a splash of rum and pineapple in there. Some things never change :)
• Oh, and the its-like-we're-in-a-music-video day. We jumped on a party boat (yes, the ones chock-full of Canadian teenagers in bikinis, and some I-wish-I-didn't-really-have-to-see-that oldies in the same garb) one evening. It took us all the way out to Rick's Cafe, docked, let people do the famous dives and jumps, and we got back after the sunset. Bob Marley in the background, choppy yet strangely soothing deep blue waters, good pizza, free flowing Red Stripe all around, a lovely breeze. What more can a girl ask for?! Other than the fact that she wished she knew how to swim!! Add that to the list :)
• A Valentine's Day special for all the couples on the resort. Cheesy pictures behind a white-and-red lace-heart prop. Red and white balloons a.k.a DTPH's Chand ne Kuch Kaha. Game shows made to make the strongest of hearts blush. Late night discotheques playing a mix of Reggae, Dancehall and R&B. Beach parties with barbeques, live music and dancing, fire shows, contests, and what not.

I'd say this was one beautiful trip. Yes, B's back was killing him from the sprain the day before we left. But he was a trooper! So we got back on that plane to Chicago sad to leave, but still happy to get back home (which would imply we stayed for just the right amount of time, I guess)

Souvenirs:

2 Jamaica T-shirts in a green so bright, a couple of fridge-magnets, some Bob Marley wrist-bands to feel the 'One Love', a memory card with a couple hundred breath-taking pictures, some 'Ya-Mon' and 'Irie' picked up for vocab usage, a stamp on the passport, and a memory of a wonderful much-delayed-honeymoon :)

Langoustine

Langoustine? Eeeeew.

A random re-run of Iron Chef, and there they were. The secret ingredient. The beady-eyed critters. Sitting there on the table and staring at you - only to be split open to reveal a slimy inside, and some stupid symbiotic foamy creature attached to the mouthparts? OMG. Disgusting! And all those tiny little legs? The crunch when they were cutting them open? Eeeeew again.

For the record, I never get put off by the sight of meat. No matter what it is. Clean it, de-bone it, do whatever to it and I don't flinch. But this stupid ye-big sucker got me wanting to puke. The grossest ever. Period.

Here is why I can never go to a culinary school around here, over abundance of weird meats.

Hello table.

Ouch. Im losing it. My mind-body coordination, that is. This is the n-th time I've banged myself against a wall or a table while turning a corner recently. And it is almost always the same wall at home or the same table at work. HellloooOOO.. Talk about freaky!

Dear Mind,
Please make note of the fact that there are objects around you. I would be more grateful if I didn't have to endure a sharp stab of pain every now and then. Its not as if I don't process whatever it is you are relaying to me. So quit being a moron and stay alert!
Disgruntled,
Body.